Forgiveness -- a Hard Thing to Do

Forgiveness is very hard to do sometimes. But it is a command!

Today I read an article on the Elijah List, entitled "Forgiveness of Former Wounds." Read it. It's really good. I could not do it justice here... Especially since this is an area I am struggling with right now.

The question I keep asking is, "How can you keep forgiving someone, who seems to be clueless to the hurt they are causing you and are sometimes unwilling to change that even when you confront them?"

What makes all this the more difficult is that I am a very introverted person... I am also a peacemaker... So for me to rock the boat is difficult. I'll often rather take the offense or hurt or, even, abuse, than to confront and cause "more" trouble. I'll keep everything bottled up inside, in the hopes that I won't exasperate the situation. It is a coping mechanism from my childhood. When my parents would fight, I would keep everything bottled up so as not to cause more trouble... I saw my brother speak out and that would just cause the fighting to escalate.

Now, to borrow a phrase from Dr. Phil, "How's that working for ya?!" It's not! But I don't know what else to do.

Without getting into specifics, there is a person in my life that continues to hurt me, disrespect me, and in their actions and words, devalue me. This person is some one very close to me, and someone I wish I could have a healthy and good relationship with. BUT, when I do mention this to them, they shrug it off as my problem, like they don't have this problem... Or they flatly deny any such wrong doing and promptly 2 seconds later put me down again.

I have forgive this person many times before, but where is the limit? Where is the point where I am "allowed" to end this? I know God is my justice and He'll take care of the wrongs towards me... But how long do I have to endure the repeated pain?

I guess all I can do is pray as Robert Ricciardelli prayed in his article, "Holy Spirit, I pray that you will bring remembrance to past wounds only to check our hearts for true and full forgiveness to those who have afflicted us. Father, we realize that it is a command and we also realize that if we do not, then even our sins will not be forgiven. Father, of myself, I can do nothing, and in no way have the strength, courage, and obedience to forgive. But, Father, in you and through the power of the Holy Spirit, who lives in me, I choose to forgive all of them that you have brought to my remembrance, in Jesus' name. I even go further and ask you to bless them that did this to me and make yourself known to them Father, in Jesus' mighty name, Amen!"